What is the right decision and how to be sure you make one

Was there a time you had to make a decision which, at least at the time you had to make it, seemed as if it was a matter of life and death?

How to identify the right decision

You thought about all the alternatives and tried to figure out which choice would be the best one. You even made scenarios of what the outcome might be short term and long term.

That is something that is always stressful and I think is always doomed to failure.

We usually try to collect all information available, we ask for other people’s experiences and opinions. What would our friends and loved ones do if they had to take this specific decision?

And then what?

Is there anyone who can reassure us that this is the right choice for us? And after all, what does the right choice mean?

Usually, most of us are carried away by what other people usually do in similar circumstances, by what other people advise us, by what we think that other people will think about us once we make a specific decision.

But, I think that if you ask the same question to 100 different persons there is a good chance you get lots of different answers and then it gets even more confusing.

What did each one of them have in mind when giving a specific answer? What were the experiences they had that led to this answer? What was the emotional status at the moment the answer was provided?

Truth be told. Nobody, but nobody, can really help us in taking the right decision.

Each one of us is so special and different. And that is good. It is great actually!

Even if we try our best to make sure we have collected all the data available that would probably help us in making the best possible choice, we can never be absolutely sure that this was it.

Honestly, how much could we ever know about something that has not yet happened to us? About something we have not yet experienced?

Right. Nothing!

“When making a decision of minor importance, I have always found it advantageous to consider all the pros and cons”. Sigmund Freud

The meaning of feelings and decisions

There is only one thing we can tell for sure related to feelings and decisions and that is how we feel the moment we finally make that decision.

Happy? Relieved? Excited? Frightened? Anxious? Terrified?

All the above and even more are possible post decision making feelings and usually more than one of them simultaneously. Do they indicate whether the decision was right or wrong? I would say not necessarily.  

They indicate exactly what they are and nothing more. Our feelings the moment we made the specific decision. Whether the decision was right or wrong is something that only time can tell for sure.

Embrace your choices

Whatever the choice made, what we have to do is embrace our choice and move on as if we are absolutely sure that this choice was the best. Because it was the best at the specific moment.  No need to question the choice. This would only cause unnecessary suffering and fear.

The important thing is to make a choice. A choice that could save your life, change your life, change you and your relationships with others.

Our life becomes what we make it, through the choices we make each and every day of our life. Even the smallest ones can lead us somewhere we have never imagined.

“In any moment of decision, the best thing you can do is the right thing, the next best thing is the wrong thing, and the worst thing you can do is nothing.” Theodore Roosevelt

“If you take too long in deciding what to do with your life, you’ll find you’ve done it”. George Bernard Shaw

What about you? What are your thoughts about the decision making process?

48 thoughts on “What is the right decision and how to be sure you make one

    • I think we all at some point tent to think “what if” but whenever we make a decision we always make it cause we consider it as the right one and this is how we should treat it from that moment on.
      Thank you for reading and commenting!

      Like

  1. Great post! Thank you.

    Sometimes we make decisions that make our mistake a dead end. Sometimes the decisions we make make our lives better. But in both cases, one has to wait for the result… Unfortunately, it is not always possible to make the right decisions.

    Liked by 2 people

    • It is never possible to be sure you made the right decision but each time you make one it is because you think it is the right one. The outcome is always unknown but even bad decision turn into great experiences for next time you have to deal with something similar. Thank you very much for taking time to read and share your opinion on it!

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  2. Fantastic article. I struggle when it comes to making life altering decisions. Will I do the wrong thing? What if this what if that? But, after reading this, I feel like it normalises that yes, sometimes we might make the wrong decision. But that’s part of being human.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Since we all make a decision after all there is no point doubting the decision. Nothing to win out of it. Even if it was a wrong decision nothing stops us from making a new decision every singe moment. Thank you for taking time to read and share your opinion!

      Like

  3. Great post! Yes it’s easy to go down the analysis-paralysis road.
    I tend to gather data to have a general picture then go with guts. I generally never look back. Whether good or bad, each decision contributes to gaining experience.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Totally agree. Whether good or bad, each decision when made is the decision you have to live with it’s consequences and all decisions and their outcome become experiences in the end.
      Thank you for taking time to read and comment!

      Like

  4. I always think when making these types of decisions it’s good to get advice and extra info/opinions from those around you that you love and respect — but ultimately we’re the ones who will have to live with/experience the consequences. Most of the time (in my personal experience) I think we already know the answer and the choices we’re going to make even before we ask for help, etc. We’re just seeking comfort that things will work out in the end. This was a really thoughtful post — thanks for sharing!

    Liked by 1 person

    • More or less we all follow the same procedure in order to make a decision. I do agree that the basic reason for asking the opinion of others is to seek comfort that things will work out in the end. Thank you for sharing your opinion on it!

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  5. Love this! I’m a really indecisive person and have always really struggled when making decisions, but I definitely agree with all of this! I personally use pro con lists a lot (a friend bought me this super helpful knock knock pad for it) and when in doubt you can always toss a coin, haha (apparently your reaction reveals what you really wanted to do?). Thanks for sharing ❤

    Liked by 1 person

    • I am glad you liked it! Our reactions reveal our feelings toward our decision, so yes, I would call it what we feel that we wanted to do at that specific time. Thank you for taking time to read and share your opinion on it!

      Liked by 1 person

  6. This was so motivational. Self-doubt is such an issue in the modern world and I think learning to appreciate and understand that our choices make us unique is very important!

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Hnmmm, this is a very subjective topic. I believe that whatever choices you make will have consequences whether good or bad. And the choices you make will affect other people’s choices as well, it’s a train of reaction. So it’s important to always think about your choices first before making them. But thinking too long will render you doing nothing and thinking too little will render you damning the consequences. So always think good choices because it affects others to do good as well. Thanks for sharing

    Liked by 1 person

    • The only thing for sure is that all choices have consequences whether good or bad. The thing is that we can never be absolutely sure about the outcome. Even choices that are well thought and are taken as really good turn out to be catastrophic. I think we all think about what will be the best or us but we are not always in possition to know for sure. Totally agree that whatever the choice does not only affect only us but also others. Thank you for taking time to read and share your thoughts on this ❤

      Liked by 1 person

  8. I loved this Eri! Deciding on what decision is right for you can be hard. Most times, before I take a decision, I think it through. Whenever we make a decision, we make that decision because in our head, it is the best at the specific moment and so if afterwards, we find out that it was a wrong decision, instead of complaining or feeling sad, we should embrace our choice and move on as if the choice we made was the best. Recently, I made a decision without thinking. I literally had seconds to decide on what I wanted to do. I have been feeling sad about that decision I took but it’s time to let all sadness go. That decision was the best decision at the specific time. Thank you so much for sharing!

    Liked by 1 person

    • I am glad you liked it Ruth! We all have to embrace our choices. After all even if something turns out really bad we can make a different choice from then on. Thank you for sharing your experience 🙂

      Like

  9. Valuable post! I totally agree with you about embracing your choices and not questioning it. For me, whether it’s a right or wrong choice, there’s always a lesson to learn. Some we may regret, some we’re proud but in the end – we are what we choose to be! x

    Liked by 1 person

  10. Really enjoyed this thought-provoking post. When making decisions, I seldom make split second ones, but am guilty of mulling things over for way too long. Whatever the method, I’ve seldom regretted a decision.
    As you stated, it is important to make a choice.

    Liked by 1 person

  11. Great tips, we might doubt our decision but if we don’t do it. We will never learn or know if it’s right or not. For me, I look at it from different aspects before proceeding to and it depends on what is the decision. These will help a lot. Thank you for sharing!

    Liked by 1 person

  12. Awesome! Totally agree that “Truth be told. Nobody, but nobody, can really help us in taking the right decision.” Absolutely. Go within. And love your quote from Freud, that weighing all the pros and cons is a great way to make MINOR decisions. I sometimes do research and weigh pros and cons, but ultimately, my inner voice makes the final call. Meditating helps. And, making no decision is making a decision. Great post!

    Liked by 1 person

    • I think it is always our inner voice that makes the final call. Pros and cons lists and others opinions we just need them as an additional confirmation of what we already know. Thank you Laura for sharing your opinion on this post! I am glad you liked it 🙂

      Like

  13. Making a decision came be so difficult at times. I have in the past had regret and feel like I have made the wrong choices in life. I have recently come to terms with that. Its good to analyze and think about something before doing it. I try to really come to terms with what choice was made.

    Liked by 1 person

    • I think you all analyze it more or less when we have to make a decision. The important is to embrace the final choice and stop questioning it. Thank you for reading and commenting 😊

      Like

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