Was there a time you had to make a decision which, at least at the time you had to make it, seemed as if it was a matter of life and death?
How to identify the right decision
You thought about all the alternatives and tried to figure out which choice would be the best one. You even made scenarios of what the outcome might be short term and long term.
That is something that is always stressful and I think is always doomed to failure.
We usually try to collect all information available, we ask for other people’s experiences and opinions. What would our friends and loved ones do if they had to take this specific decision?
And then what?
Is there anyone who can reassure us that this is the right choice for us? And after all, what does the right choice mean?
Usually, most of us are carried away by what other people usually do in similar circumstances, by what other people advise us, by what we think that other people will think about us once we make a specific decision.
But, I think that if you ask the same question to 100 different persons there is a good chance you get lots of different answers and then it gets even more confusing.
What did each one of them have in mind when giving a specific answer? What were the experiences they had that led to this answer? What was the emotional status at the moment the answer was provided?
Truth be told. Nobody, but nobody, can really help us in taking the right decision.
Each one of us is so special and different. And that is good. It is great actually!
Even if we try our best to make sure we have collected all the data available that would probably help us in making the best possible choice, we can never be absolutely sure that this was it.
Honestly, how much could we ever know about something that has not yet happened to us? About something we have not yet experienced?
“When making a decision of minor importance, I have always found it advantageous to consider all the pros and cons”. Sigmund Freud
The meaning of feelings and decisions
There is only one thing we can tell for sure related to feelings and decisions and that is how we feel the moment we finally make that decision.
Happy? Relieved? Excited? Frightened? Anxious? Terrified?
All the above and even more are possible post decision making feelings and usually more than one of them simultaneously. Do they indicate whether the decision was right or wrong? I would say not necessarily.
They indicate exactly what they are and nothing more. Our feelings the moment we made the specific decision. Whether the decision was right or wrong is something that only time can tell for sure.
Embrace your choices
Whatever the choice made, what we have to do is embrace our choice and move on as if we are absolutely sure that this choice was the best. Because it was the best at the specific moment. No need to question the choice. This would only cause unnecessary suffering and fear.
The important thing is to make a choice. A choice that could save your life, change your life, change you and your relationships with others.
Our life becomes what we make it, through the choices we make each and every day of our life. Even the smallest ones can lead us somewhere we have never imagined.
“In any moment of decision, the best thing you can do is the right thing, the next best thing is the wrong thing, and the worst thing you can do is nothing.” Theodore Roosevelt
“If you take too long in deciding what to do with your life, you’ll find you’ve done it”. George Bernard Shaw
What about you? What are your thoughts about the decision making process?